Hash 400 – Horseshoe @ Mildenhall

This is an apostrophe friendly mag – no apostrophes having been harmed in its creation.

I am sorry to admit this, but I have been feeling depressed all year and I lay the blame entirely with the government. According to results recently published of one of their surveys, it seems we are supposed to start feeling old at precisely 59 years, 2 months and 2 weeks; which in my calendar was sometime last summer. In this depressed state, the one slim thread of hope I am hanging onto is that the survey cannot have included any hashers, since if it had then the results would surely have been entirely different. Also, and purely as a precautionary measure, I am considering keeping an eye out for a younger woman, because as any aging pop star will confirm, “You are only as old as the woman you feel”; which might explain some of their childish behaviour – but probably best not go there.

Continuing slightly in this vein (the aging vein that is), one thing that does come to mind is that my ability to get facts wrong now seems in direct proportion to my certainty that I am right. An example of this cropped up last week with the email GOM sent out advertising the 400th Hash at Mildenhall, within which he highlighted the Roman stuff found etc etc. I knew nothing of this, so rushed off to my computer, googled around a bit, then banged off an email, effectively accusing him of getting his facts wrong.

I stand corrected, so “Brian, I apologise, you were right”,

But in my defense please let me explain a little more, courtesy of Wikipaedia, as there are two Mildenhalls each with their own Roman history.

Mildenhall, Wiltshire
The Roman town of Cunetio, located across the River Kennet from the modern town of Mildenhall, Wiltshire, was occupied from the 2nd century AD until the end of the Roman period, early 5th century, when it was apparently abandoned. Its location was identified from aerial photos of crop marks taken in 1940, and the site has been sporadically excavated since the 1950s. In the 1960s, a small coin hoard was found, followed in 1978 by the much larger Cunetio Hoard of over 55,000 coins. The Roman town grew around a mansio, built near a crossroad. Later a straight-road planned grid area was built, but by the fourth century, when some substantial town walls were erected, the planned streets lay outside the new walls and had presumably been abandoned. The site was dug in 2009 by the Channel 4 Time Team, who found many more coins and other objects.

Mildenhall, Suffolk
The Mildenhall Treasure is a major hoard of highly decorated Roman silver tableware from the fourth-century AD, found at West Row, near Mildenhall in Suffolk. It consists of two large serving platters, two small decorated serving plates, a deep fluted bowl, a set of four large decorated bowls, two small decorated bowls, two small pedestalled dishes, a deep flanged bowl with a deep, domed cover, five small round ladles with dolphin-shaped handles, and eight long-handled spoons (cochlearia). The hoard was discovered while ploughing in January 1942 by Gordon Butcher, who removed it from the ground with help from Sydney Ford, for whom he was working at the time. They did not recognise the objects for what they were, and the hoard did not come to the attention of the authorities until 1946. An inquest was held in the summer of that year, when the find was declared Treasure Trove and acquired by the British Museum in London.

Anyway, better mention the hash sometime soon, which as you already know was the 400th, and fittingly laid by Mike, who not only laid the first, second, third, fourth, …. many many moons ago, but has also now notched up some 70 in total. Some off his previous hashes were poorly attended (e.g. Hash No 3 at Shalbourne which had only 2 runners and 1 walker), but for this one we had an excellent turnout out. Luckily for us, he is with all this experience now getting the idea on how to lay a good trail, and this was one of them – no hazards (not even any floods), interesting countryside, spectacular views, and apparently no one got lost. One of his pet themes is to have everyone back at the pub within the hour, and told us that this was expected for the 400th; it seems that some of us need to raise our game a bit and stop dawdling along the route engaged in idle chatter.

Olly being a good runner, is always keen to be up front leading the way, but he must a have been a little dismayed at the start as he was heard to mutter “Oh ****, Colin is here!”. As everyone knows, Colin just powers himself round the course with boundless energy and this is exactly what happened on the day. The rest of us, including Olly, trailed behind as we made our way round and then back towards the pub around the field where Cunetio lies hidden beneath.

Back at the pub we all sat outside, first on the patio and then, when the sun came out, on the lawn. Kathy took charge of the collection for the buffet whilst GOM announced Liz and Hilary as respective winners for the 2012 Best Hare and 2012 Best Mag competitions. He handed out appropriate prizes (Ferrero Rocher chocolates he was probably trying to get rid of) and then we all trundled into the pub for food.

No speeches or cabaret this time, just enjoyable chatter, excellent food and a few extra drinks. Margaret awarded the horn – which as usual she presented to Mike, and Jeremy returned the chickens to GOM – Kathy getting quite excited at just their mention.

Many thanks to Mike who hopefully will continue to be as industrious as ever with his trail laying. He was last seen with a calculator trying to work out how old he will be on the 800th hash – by which time the government will no doubt think him old.