Hash 598 – Swan @ Wilton

16 May 2021SoniaJeremy

Line of Duty – Series 7

Episode 1 – Mystery of the missing ‘flour’

Scene 1 – AC-12 HQ – office of Detective Superintendent Ted Hastings

Steve, come in here please.

DI Steve Arnott enters


Steve, we’ve a problem with a possible Organised Crime Group (OCG) in Kennet Valley. They appear to be heavily involved in drug trafficking. However, there is also evidence that many gang members are using prescription drugs, so they may be handling those as well.

It’s been difficult getting any reliable intelligence on the OCG but we now have an Undercover Drug Squad Officer (UDSO) embedded within the group who has reported that this OCG is quite unusual – not only are most members of the group even older than the Hatton Garden gang but they seem to use rather quaint code words, such as ‘Hash’, ‘Flour’ and ‘Ibuprofen’, which we assume reference the Cannabis, Cocaine and Prescription drugs they are presumed to traffic.

The most recent report from the UDSO is that the OCG has recently lost a few kilos of cocaine – or ‘flour’. This is causing internal concern and thought likely to result in a leadership challenge in the near future. We can all guess the potential bloodbath as they try to recover their ‘flour’ and settle any disputes.

Yes sir – but what’s this OCG ‘flour’, reported to us by the UDSO, got to do with AC-12?

Good question fella! The reason is that we think it’s been stolen by a BO.

A BO sir – what’s a BO?

Jesus, Mary, Joseph, and the wee donkey! A BO is a Bent Officer – don’t you keep up with the acronyms?

Yes sir – sorry sir. We know it can’t be H as we definately got him last series.

No it’s not H – we believe the new BO is SK.

SK sir! But SK is the UDSO!

Yes! SK is an ex-Commando and now appears to have gone rogue and to be involved as a BO not only in drugs, but also fraud and the targeting of vulnerable adults (VAs).

Not VAs sir! That’s shocking.

Now Steve, I need you to find SK, locate and recover this ‘flour’, and if possible determine where they produce and store their drugs. You can use Kate Fleming if needed.

Thank you sir, but that’s not possible as Kate’s uncontactable at present. The underpass where we normally meet is flooded and you know she won’t get her feet wet.

OK son. Take some PCs instead and let’s see how they do. If any show any sign of intelligence we can put them forward for their detective exams. Keep me updated on progress.

Scene 2 –  In the countryside – dull wet and windy. Steve Arnott on phone

Sir – I’m at the scene now sir….

SK does indeed appear to be on the run with the stolen ‘flour’. The search teams have been organised by DS Pinder – although there is very little evidence of where SK went….

Update from a local. He has suggested we should go Right, Right, Right, not fall in a canal and cross a line twice. He sounded like a Right Michael (RM), but it’s the best evidence so far….

First teams are reporting back sir – no progress at all….

Constable Spillane (dog handler)

Constables Cole and Spillane are now off on their own – they appear to be following clues from a Medium – not that I believe in such methods….

Progress at last sir – although we had to go Right, Right, Left. We’ve found a small amount of ‘flour’ which SK possibly accidentally spilt….

Constable “Coppins”

We are in hot pursuit and continuing to make slow progress – luckily it seems likely that the ‘flour’ is improperly packed and continuing to leak, probably without SK’s knowledge….

Sir – we’ve reached a line. Although dangerous, we have crossed at a number of points but no evidence that SK went that way. It’s just delaying us….

Shin Splintley team

We are at a canal now sir – still minimal evidence – can we bring in frogmen? That might be our only chance….

Good news sir! We have just liaised with the team led by Constable Fisher who not only is following his own fruitful leads, but has also highlighted some Long Evidence (LE) which he uncovered and which we ourselves are now pursuing….

We’re closing in sir. It seems that SK is near The Windmill (TW). We are aborting our own investigations and will return there post-haste with the team from Shin Splintley (SS)….

Good work son – now we’re sucking diesel.

We’re at TW sir. It is clear this is the OCG’s drug laboratory. SK must be panicking given the amount of ‘flour’ now being found as she continues her flight. Arrests of some of the OCG are in progress.

Scene 3 – A few days later – AC-12 HQ again

Congratulations fella, but what I want to know is whether SK is really a BO.

Yes sir – no sir!  SK is definately not a BO sir – but was instead acting in a cunning way as UDSO to mask her undercover work and then to locate and lead us to the OCG drug factory. 

Good news Steve. Unfortunately, it appears that SK had formed an inappropriate relationship with one of the OCG members, who it turns out had been feeding us false evidence from the start. RM, as it was he, will be charged along with the other OCG members arrested at TW.

SK, with RM
Constable Fisher

Other outcomes sir are as follows:

  • – Constables Cole and Spillane have been warned to cease from using Mediums in future without prior written authorisation.
  • – Constable Fisher appears to have some limited leadership qualities and is being prepared for his Sergeant exams.
  • – The SS team are being advised to gossip less and focus more on pursuing the evidence. Police work is not supposed to be fun.

Thank you Steve – that will be all.

Oh – by the way, are you putting on weight son?


Apologies to all who haven’t been watching Line of Duty.

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