| Date | Hare | Scribe |
|---|---|---|
| 23 Jun 2024 | Tim, Rubber & Babe | Viv |
Well…..where to begin? Back to the theme of my last mag I think – which was suggesting that perhaps we’re all getting a bit too geriatric for hashing. Today certainly seemed to confirm that, for a number of reasons. As we all gathered in the Pelican carpark, dozens of North Wilts Hashers turned up, looking worryingly young and fit. As we all began introducing ourselves, it gradually became apparent that our hare for the day, Jeremy, was nowhere to be seen – which was unusual for him as he’s normally early to greet us after laying a trail. Had he perhaps got lost in the wilds of Froxfield, and we’d have to send out search parties to rescue him?
Eventually we decided to phone him, and were slightly disappointed that nothing as exciting as that had happened; he just offered some lame excuse about being told NWH were setting the trail today. GOM was adamant that he’d told Jeremy that NW would be joining us to follow Jeremy’s trail, and he then spent the next 2 hours trying to locate the email trail to provide the evidence. The rest of us were fascinated to discover who would turn out to be the most geriatric of the two. And eventually GOM displayed the proof …… that Jeremy had forgotten he was the hare for the day, and we all solemnly agreed this is a definite sign that senility is setting in.
After a few minutes of trying to decide whether to go home and spend the morning doing something that might actually be enjoyable instead of hashing, the ever resourceful NW Hashers quickly came up with a solution. Two of them went off to find some flour and would then lay a trail 10 minutes ahead of the rest of us. The first problem though was that the pub was clean out of flour, so the hares had to resort to knocking on house doors until they found an elderly lady – apparently at least 60 years old – who produced a bag of self-raising from her cupboard. The hares tried to give her £1.50 for it, but she declined, saying the bag had cost her £1.75 (a skilled negotiator by the sound of it) and the hares had to pay her £2 as they were getting pretty desperate by then.
Meanwhile, back at the Pelican, the hashers were eyeing each other up, trying to decide which group would be the most humiliated by getting left behind on the run. The NW group seemed to be fairly reassured when they realised that the only two KVH runners (Viv & John) must have a combined age of well over 160. But lo and behold, our saviours arrived in the form of Sonia and Mike – which brought the average age of the KVH runners down by at least 50%.
So after giving the hares their 10 minute lead, off we all set, walkers and runners, to follow a great trail. This was a new route for us, and we explored areas we’d not seen before. We fully expected to catch the hares up, but they were well ahead and were nowhere to be seen. The route was really well laid, with plenty of circle checks to allow the slower runners to catch up. But with so many circles it became evident that one bag of flour wasn’t enough for the hares, and for the last couple of miles they’d resorted to using arrows made of flowers and bracken, all looking rather artistic. How they had time to do all this flower arranging and still get back to the pub before us, was a complete mystery.
Back in the garden at the Pelican, we all agreed it had been a great hash, laid by two very innovative hares. It was interesting to see the two hash groups initially divide themselves like guests at a wedding, with hashers sitting in their distinct hash groups. John and I couldn’t stay for the apres, so have nothing to report on what happened after we’d left, but I’m sure after a few beers and down downs, the two groups soon began to mingle.
It was certainly good to have a large group of runners for a change, and we all agreed we’ll do a combined hash again soon – in fact on the 21st July when NW will be laying a trail from Liddington Village Inn. Looking forward to it already!
So all’s well that ends well …….. but if his senility is the rapidly progressing type, that may be the last we’ve seen of Jeremy.
GOM Note on après:
The respective hash groups did initially sit amongst their own. I gave the usual KVH speech to the KVH congregation and invited Roger “Babe” (NWH3 hare for the day) over to say thanks to him and Tim & Rubber for laying the trails today. KVH then joined NWH for their down, down and before proceedings began I conveyed my thanks again the the larger congregation for “Babe’s” and “Tim’s & Rubber’s” efforts.