Hash 503 – The Whole Hog @ Malmesbury

Date Hare Scribe
27 Nov 2016 Jeremy John

Malmesbury is a very attractive market town which was prominent in the Middle Ages as a centre for learning focused on the Abbey, a rare survival of the dissolution of the monasteries during the time of Henry VIII.

Another claim to fame for Malmesbury, which became a large media event, was in 1998 when two Tamworth pigs escaped from the town’s abattoir, swam the Tetbury River and lived in an orchard for a week before capture.

503-1Most of us arrived at the car park the usual way, i.e. along the road, but two hashers following their sat navs, turned right too early and came down a narrow street used as access only to private houses. Unfortunately, this led down a flight of steps to a very width-restricted footbridge (6ft 6in) over the river. Our intrepid drivers were not deterred however, so with folded in wing mirrors, and one summonimg Brian’s assistance, they finally reach the main car park – I made up the part about the flight of steps, it wasn’t totally like ‘The Italian Job’.

503-2The town is at the convergence of two rivers, the Bristol Avon which flows from Sherston and the Tetbury Avon, known locally as the Ingleburn, that meet on the southern edge of the town. As a consequence of this, the hash route took us alongside the rivers, and over wooden bridges too numerous to count. The hash was one of the most picturesque we have run, with superb views of the Abbey in the distance. The route followed the old railway track and the river, and we passed many attractive riverside properties.

After an interesting well planned route we walked up the steps to the “Whole Hog” pub in the centre of Malmesbury for refreshments. According to Trip Advisor this is a scruffy place, unpretentious and with a predominantly male clientele but a good list of regional real ales. Sums it up pretty well, I thought. The alternative pubs had names like “The Smoking Dog” and “The Bird Cage”, so I think we did okay.


Brian, having to make his voice heard with the Hashers separated into different areas of the bar, thanked Jeremy for a splendid trail and told us the next Hash will at Brookhouse Farm in Swindon with Sue as hare.

There was also the announcement of the changing of the GOM on the 8th January Hash.

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5 Responses to Hash 503 – The Whole Hog @ Malmesbury

  1. Kathy says:

    Totally agree that this was a really picturesque hash, very enjoyable indeed thanks… and after David’s run-in with the landlord, I didn’t dare ask for my usual cuppa (which, in my and Annie’s experience, can be beyond the remit of many landlords) and settled for a boring tonic water instead! Kx

  2. Sue says:

    Yes, I was the other intrepid satnav follower. Sorry for honking my horn Hilary – I thought you’d just given up the fight and were aiming to park there on the footbridge….
    You’ll be pleased to know that I’ve practiced and practiced the route for the hash this week – and there’s no satnav involved…….

  3. Brian Reed says:

    An excellent hash all round.

  4. Hilary says:

    Thank you, John, for not naming and shaming me for being leader of the pack of ‘Italian Job’ style drivers. I guess you felt sorry for my little panicked face when I ran off dragging Brian away to help. Our Grand Old Master then steered me safely over the bridge courtesy of a variety of interesting ‘left hand down’, ‘right hand down’ gestures and facial expressions. Thank you, Brian, couldn’t have done it without you! And Sue – sorry for blocking you in. Just don’t use satnav when laying the next trail!

  5. Keith says:

    Yes this was a memorably picturesque trail and being not overlong, meant even I got back in about an hour.
    Pub was ‘authentic’ if you know what I mean, but with a miseryguts landlord who moaned at one of our number simply for moving a barstool. I ask you…..

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